My first married Christmas was miserable. Being young and naïve, Alex and I thought we could please everybody, so we woke up in Rock Hill to celebrate with my mom, drove to Lexington for lunch at his mom’s, and then trekked to his dad’s for dinner and gifts. By the end of the day, we were less Clark Griswold and more Ebenezer Scrooge. Truthfully, we were living our own version of Four Christmases without the benefit of Vince Vaughn’s jokes to lighten the mood.

The problem with the whole thing wasn’t that I was exhausted by the end of the day. I mean, that was pre-kids, when I didn’t need a daily nap and three cups of coffee. The problem was Alex and I couldn’t enjoy being at one house because we were anxiously planning our departure and worrying about getting to the next house on time.

As we’ve gotten older, Alex and I have gotten much better at making plans that allow us to enjoy each celebration without the pressure of getting to the next family, but it recently occurred to me, we might not be passing that know-how down to our boys.

Jackson is my mini-me, meaning he is all about a schedule. What can I say– I live my life by a bell. But when we were in Atlanta over Spring Break, I realized this characteristic wasn’t necessarily one I wanted to pass on.

Before we left for Atlanta, Jackson made an itinerary with our daily destinations, which was fun because it got us all excited about the trip. When we got to Atlanta, though, I noticed his schedule was starting to steal his joy. At the Georgia Aquarium, he kept asking about the upcoming Braves game; when we were at the Braves game, he kept checking my phone to see if we’d have time to go to the zoo after the game or if we’d need to save that for the next day; and when we were at the World of Coke, he kept looking at my weather app to be sure our trip to the zoo wouldn’t be rained out.

After about the third time he asked for my phone, I turned to him and said, “Can you calm down about later and just enjoy where we are?”

I immediately felt guilty saying that because I understood exactly where he was coming from. He finds comfort in the security of knowing what’s next, and that’s totally normal. I feel the same way a lot of times myself. But even though I understood his thinking, I didn’t want him to miss out on where we were by worrying too much about what was to come.

I read a quote a few year’s ago on a friend’s blog that said, “Be where your feet are,” and it’s stuck with me. Unfortunately, that idea is easier said than done, especially in a culture of FOMO. It’s easy to get caught up thinking about what we’re missing or what’s coming later, but what if what we’re missing out on isn’t an event happening elsewhere? What if what we’re missing out on is the experience happening right in front of us because we’re too busy planning ahead to notice it? Maybe that’s what we should fear.

When my brain starts getting ahead of itself and I lose sight of the here and now, I try to remember this verse from The Message version of Ecclesiastes 5:18-20: “God deals out joy in the present, the now.” I don’t know about you, but I like some joy in my life, making this verse a good reminder to stay focused on today.

Living life isn’t like watching a movie. We lose out on the magic of the moment when we try to fast forward. And since we don’t have the luxury of being able to rewind our lives, we can’t go back to relive a missed experience. Once it’s gone, it’s gone. So, let’s all take a minute this weekend to press pause, to find joy in the present, and to soak in the now, knowing tomorrow will take care of itself (Matthew 6:34).