I was in a group text the other day when one of the members sent a GIF of Lucille Ball, writing she feels a lot like Lucy these days. I can totally relate, as  I, too, have crazy curly hair, a loud laugh that often gets me in trouble, and a patient husband who has looked at me more than once and said, “You got some ‘splainin’ to do.”

But I knew that’s not really what she meant. She was talking more about the chaos of Lucy’s life, and I got that too because as soon as I read the text, I immediately thought of the famous chocolate factory episode of I Love Lucy.

Over the past six months, I have felt exactly like Lucy in this scene– overwhelmed, out of control, and stuffed full of chocolate. Perhaps you can relate? I feel like I have all of these responsibilities coming at me, and before I can get one wrapped up, the next one is passing me by. The world seems to be moving in super speed, and no matter how hard I try, I can’t keep up.

As I thought of this scene and my own ever-growing to-do list, I could feel my blood pressure rising, the stress creeping in. But then I realized I was focusing on the wrong thing. Instead of fixating on the out-of-control conveyor belt, maybe, just maybe, I should shift my focus to something else, or more specifically, someone else . . . Ethel.

In this episode, and pretty much every other one too, Ethel is right there beside Lucy the whole time. Even when things get really out of control and they know they’re going to get fired, Ethel stays loyal. Think how easy it would be for Ethel to throw her arms in the air and tell Lucy she’s on her own, that Lucy got herself into this crazy mess, she can get herself out of it. But Ethel doesn’t. She just keeps shoving bonbons in her mouth and hiding them in her hat, all to keep her friend afloat.

The past six months have been stressful, to say the least, but they have also made me realize how thankful I am to be surrounded by an amazing group of Ethels. When my mom was diagnosed with pneumonia and then Covid in July, making it necessary for me to go to Rock Hill for almost three weeks while Alex held down the fort in Columbia, my Ethels showed up and showed up big. They were there bringing us meals (and margaritas!), buying my boys’ school supplies, and even washing our clothes when our washing machine up and died. You know someone is a good friend when you’ll allow them to handle your family’s unmentionables!

Even in the midst of their own runaway conveyor belts, my Ethels have been there to talk, to listen, to pray, and to cry with me whenever I have needed them. And best of all, like Ethel and Lucy at the chocolate factory, we have had some big laughs in the midst of the chaos.

Sometimes it’s scary to let our friends help us. Society has created this myth that women have to do it all by ourselves or else we’re weak or somehow inadequate. Y’all, that’s a lie. We need each other. We’re stronger when we work together. And we have to trust that when our Ethels offer to help, they sincerely want to.

I read once that when we turn down help, we have taken away a friend’s chance to serve, the chance for her to be the hands and feet of Jesus. I don’t know about you, but that’s not something I want to get in the way of. This summer, I had to learn to say, “You know what, that would actually be a really big help. Thank you.” I’ll admit, it didn’t come naturally at first, but like most other things, the more I did it, the easier it became. And now that life is settling back down a bit, I look forward to returning the help.

So, in this season of gift giving, let’s think about what we’re truly thankful for. Or, more importantly, who we’re truly thankful for. Who’s your Ethel? Here’s to her, and here’s to all the Ethels . . . We need you. We love you. We couldn’t do life without you, nor would we want to.